Heroic spacemen risking life and limb aboard the International Space Station are braced for their latest trial: not alien attack, nor a malfunctioning psychopath computer system, but an MP3 player filled with the worst music in the universe.
The astronauts' nemesis is one Therese Miljeteig, a well-meaning teenager who won a competition last summer, the prize for which is to choose a playlist of songs to be loaded on to a portable player and launched into space. Not into the nearest sun, which is what 'I Believe I Can Fly' deserves.
We're sure these brave men and women, starved of human contact and cast adrift in the cold night of space, will be pleased the MP3 player includes 'Rockin' All Over The World' instead of, say, a recording of their families' sweet, half-remembered voices.
Readers will no doubt be dying to find out what other 'classic tracks' are boldly going where no iPod has gone before. Well, wonder no longer.
- The Beatles: Here Comes The Sun
- Frank Sinatra: Come Fly With Me
- Elton John: Rocket Man
- Joe Cocker and Jennifer Warnes: Up Where We Belong
- John Lennon: Imagine
- Irene Cara: Flashdance, What A Feeling
- Dire Straits: Walk of Life
- Celine Dion: Fly
- Status Quo: Rockin' All Over The World
- R Kelly: I Believe I Can Fly
Rocket Man! Come Fly With Me! Do you see what she's done there?
Anyway, the best thing about this whole affair is that the teenager even admits not having put much effort into her choices. VNUNet reports that she says: "I actually didn't think very hard about the MP3 tracks. I just chose the ones that came into my mind and that seemed to fit."