Disembodied Torso Mouse
Entry #1 in our list of Mice That Will Get You Fired comes from Swiss trinketeer Pat Says Now, maker of a wide array of novelty computer mice. (Some of these mouse-torsos come clothed in tiny, tight-fitting sweaters emblazoned with the logos of various soccer teams, but as the product description
reads, “Your mouse needs to take off her shirt for working properly.”) And if using it doesn’t earn you a trip to HR, well, someone at your place of employment is not working properly.
Not surprisingly, each breast on the torso is a button. They would have added a scroll wheel somewhere in between, but they're saving that for the triple-breasted "Total Recall" edition.