Make a buck with the Cucumber Sexfest

Yet another day, yet another mountain of porno e-mail . . .

This report details exactly how in a most comprehensive and exhaustive, but easy to understand style, how with very little money and minimal WWW experience YOU can earn between $900 and US$10,000 per WEEK in the Adult Services business on the World Wide Web.

Pornography, friends, is how you make money on the Internet. If you're not too fussy about where your buck comes from, forget all that e-tailing strategy, disintermediators and CRM rubbish; there is - and always has been - a lucrative market for flesh, flesh, flesh.

In this report, you will read of "Baldy" (Not his real name!) who created a lucrative business from scratch just a few months ago with just one Home Page.

According to a Financial Times report, Buchanan International, a Scottish security software company, completed a map of the seedy side of the Net late last year. It found that more than 20,000 new hosts for pornography sites are being created daily. The average site contained just 43 images, and 98 per cent hold almost no original material. But some sites pack in over 100,000 images.

In the 2nd month Baldy was earning US$150 per day (you can too) and Baldy hasn't invested a single cent in his websites - they all "self generate" income!

Online porn has saved the current generation of teenage males (it's a guy thing, after all) the anguish of smuggling skin mags out the door of the local 7-Eleven. The challenge for parents - at least for those willing to take up the challenge - is how to stop their sons from sampling all that the Internet has to offer.

A pimply-faced kid may get his fill of topless bikini models in a magazine and never consider going to sit in the dark at a peep-show. But on the Net it's a snap to move from photos to movies, from topless models to bestiality, from Playboy to Harmony's Best Buxom Bondagettes, all with the click of a button. Are you going to stand over their shoulder, have one of those awkward parent-son conversations, or cross your fingers and hope they won't surf any further than nineMSN?

So why not learn the "tricks of the trade" from some of the MOST SUCCESSFUL people on the web - the Adult Web Masters & Mistresses.

Porn is hardly new - the more things change, the more they become digitised. But the Internet has brought at least the potential of pornography in all its shades into the home and office. No matter your take on censorship, no one can argue that the Internet makes access easier.

This is why network security will continue to grow in importance. An informal survey of 60 Australian companies by e-mail filtering company EmuTech found that 88 per cent had received pornographic e-mail, and that 52 per cent had then forwarded it to other people. Never mind the morality of the content - consider the drop in productivity of staff pawing over nudes, and the ever-present threat of litigation for companies perceived to condone offensive material. This is what is fuelling the development of sophisticated filtering tools (note: blatant tech stock buying tip) to stop the porn breaching the corporate firewall.

In the meantime, here's a game you and your partner can play with the flood of porn e-mails likely to be clogging your inbox. The aim is to bring the subject of those "special" e-mails into an everyday conversation between your loved ones, just like you were discussing old friends while sipping hot Milo. A typical conversation might proceed something like the following - and please note that, like the tale of Baldy, all the e-mails are real, preserved with their inimitable vocabulary and punctuation:

"Any e-mail today, Mark?"

"Yes, dear, janet69 wants to know ARE YOU HORNY? and sk4h9o8u2s4 simply says TIT TALK!!!"

"That's nice. Such lovely people, those two. And those 'hot' people, how are they today?"

"Very warm, it seems - there are messages from See hot girls, Do you like hot sex? and the Hot Sexy Teen Girls."

"Splendid! They are so good at keeping in touch."

"Somebody wants us to know about an Award Winning Adult Site."

"I never knew there was a Nobel Prize for Online Smut! Good luck to them!"

"And there is an "amazing penis enlargement breakthrough" which somebody called superlarge@joymail.com kindly let us know about."

"My cup runneth over - anything else?"

"JoeJo simply wanted to say Cucumber Sexfest!!"

"JoeJo is a man of few words."

"Oh, and Cindy says 'hi'."

"That's nice, dear."

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MARK STAFFORD

PC World
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