5 reasons why Ghostbusters: The Videogame is going to be lame

  • Over the past 24 hours, Aussie and European gamers have been reeling from the shock news that Ghostbusters: The Videogame [[artnid:302320|will be a PlayStation exclusive]]. Incensed Wii and Xbox owners have been crying foul on every corner of the Net, while the Sony elite smile smugly and unleash the trolls of war (“who ya gonna call? Not Bill Gates! Boo-ya! Etc.”)

    Being an Xbox owner, I got carried away by the hoopla like the rest of 'em, before coming to a sober and unbiased realisation – Ghostbusters: The Videgame will almost certainly suck. Think about it. This is the same project that started life as a ropy Zootfly video demonstration on YouTube. How can it possibly be anything other than awful?

    Now, we’re not supposed to pass judgment on a game before we review it – to do so would be grossly unprofessional. But if it looks like barbequed dog hair, and smells like barbequed dog hair, it must be a duck covered in barbequed dog hair.

    In the following slideshow, we list the five top reasons why Xbox and Wii owners are better off without Ghostbusters: The Videogame. It wont ease the pain, but it's the best pitiful balm we could come up with...

  • 1. It’s been in frequent development limbo – never a good sign

    In its chequered development history, Ghostbusters: The Videogame has changed publishers’ hands like the proverbial hot potato… or possibly a poisoned chalice. Over the past few years, it has passed through the doors of Zootfly, Sierra, Vivendi, Activision, Atari and finally Sony (three of whom are now all but dead).

    Tellingly, when Activision merged with Vivendi in 2007, it put the production of Ghostbusters on indefinite hiatus. Despite huge online interest and a massive preinstalled fanbase, the company decided to ditch the project and let Atari pick up the pieces instead. It’s not exactly a testament to quality is it? Especially when you consider that Atari will publish anything. Ghostbusters: The Videogame might just be the new DRIV3R.

  • 2. The Sony connection – ZOMG TEH CONSIPIRACY!

    With barely a month to go, Atari has unexpectedly partnered with Sony Computer Entertainment to bring Ghostbusters: The Videogame to PAL territories. This is unusual, and does not bode well.

    Details are currently sketchy as to why this sudden deal transpired. Did Sony, which owns the Ghostbusters movie franchise, somehow force Atari’s hand? Did Atari make a lucrative deal in a manner similar to GTA IV’s exclusive downloadable content? ...Or could it be that Atari is trying to distance itself from the game before it’s even released? Additional conspiracy theories on a postcard please.
  • 3. It’s got Alyssa Milano in it

    What is this, the 80s? Alyssa Milano hasn’t had a good role since Who’s The Boss! Still. Phwooar, eh? [That’s the last time you're using that picture Chris. – Ed.]
  • 4. Egon’s hair looks funny

    Look at Egon’s hair. It looks stupid. It makes the game stupid.
  • 5. Ummm...

    Oh, sod it. Who are we kidding? It’s Ghostbusters! Of course it’s going to be awesome! Why have you forsaken us Atari? Give us back Slimer! Give us back Venkman! Give us back [[artnid:296439|Alyssa Milano]]! We’re so crushed we could almost cry.

    We'll bring you a full review when the game comes out. [And don't worry – we won’t let any filthy Xbox or Wii owners review it. PlayStation for the win! – Ed.]
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